Where's my quarterly review? I know to some it mind sound silly, but I think this 'mothering' occupation would be much easier if we had bosses. I personally thrive on positive reinforcement and constructive criticism, which is something we get absolutely none of in this business. Sometimes even when you do everything right: you're cheerful, fun and even manage to sneak in a counting lesson, your toddler still has a melt down in the middle of a parking lot. Wouldn't it be nice to get the occasional 'hey, you did a really good job with that nap time routine' or 'what a great lunch you made, but you probably didn't need to give him so many crackers'. How I would love feedback like this. Instead it's nothing. All we hear is the screaming coming from our toddlers room telling us they aren't napping yet again and those damn voices in our head. You know the ones, they tell us we aren't good enough or thin enough and why have you still not made one of those diy marble slides out of cardboard boxes yet???
I'm not saying a more professional-job-like-setting would eliminate the voices, but it would be a healthy reminder of where you are at.
I mean, we don't even have a job description. WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO BE DOING ALL DAY? Is it just taking care of the kids? or is it housework too? Ideally it would be just the children and John and I would split the housework, right? But, why take away from his quality time with the babies by making him scrub the bathtub?
It would be wonderful to live in a commune, wouldn't it? The responsibility of chores and cooking and child-caring could be shared? Not to mention you would have other adults to interact with during the day. There is something quite depressing about going ten hours everyday only talking to people under the age of three.
But it's not a 'job' is it. Not really. We have no title that truly encompasses what we do all day, no job description and no quarterly reviews. But, we also need to remember that we don't have to 'ask off' in the evenings, our partners are not hired babysitters and if yours is like mine, he is more than willing to share the load as long as I communicate it with him.
No, it's not a job in the traditional sense. But it's the hardest work anyone has ever done (and I doubt you'd find many who'd argue with that). Every part of your body, soul and mind have been altered since you had children and every part of you is absolutely drained and refilled multiple times a day.
I love what I do, really. But y'all, I get so tired!
Three cheers for all you stay at home mamas out there! We are doing a great job y'all! (but maybe layoff the crackers) ;)
Monday, April 7, 2014
pictures speak for themselves don't they? (psst, have you heard of VSCOcam yet? I'm normally late to the game on these kind of things, but someone shared it with me recently and i'm having so much fun editing pictures on my phone with it!)
Thursday, April 3, 2014
|dress: vintage, thrifted from Buffalo Exchange $23/ Shoes: tjmaxx|
I love this set of pictures, they seem incredibly youthful to me. Which I love as the big 3-0 is looming around the corner. Actually I shouldn't say 'looming', I am quite excited about entering my thirties, I believe it is going the be the decade for me (well, that and my 60's, I think that decade is going to be where it's at! I'll travel the country in an RV with john, wear big gaudy rings on each finger and probably start smoking cigarettes again ;). Yes my 60's will be magical). BUT, my thirties will also be a blast... although I'm sure I'll spend much of the decade packing lunches and helping these rugrats with homework, I believe it will be the decade that I'll finally tap into the wealth of my creativity. A decade that I will finally start taking myself seriously as an artist. I'm pumped. It will be perfect. But for now I'll enjoy the last few weeks of my youthful twenties.
Sunday, March 30, 2014
It was January of 2010, I had been out of my marriage for 6 months and was ready to commit again. This time though I was going to make it easier. I was going to find someone I could love effortlessly who would show me affections in return. So, I started making daily trips to the animal shelter. I had a short list of criteria for the dog which included female and healthy. Bronson was neither. He wasn't even Bronson then, he was called 'hershey', blind in one eye with broken hip, he was a mess of a dog. After making the rounds to see the new dogs of the day I would always get 'hershey' out of his kennel, take him on a little walk and play with him. He never barked and always greeted me with a multitude of slobber. I would sit in his kennel and talk to him and he would listen, in the way only a dog can.
One day when walking out of the shelter wondering where my dog was, I realized he is my dog. I brought home bronson the next day. Who at first I wanted to name 'hank' (but decided I didn't like the way it sounded when yelling "ha-ank") but because he still reminded me of an old tough-on-the-outside but soft-on-the-inside cowboy, I went with Bronson.
And he's been driving me crazy ever since.
You know how people are always saying dogs and owners look alike? Well, we don't (at least no one has told me so ... yet). But we sure do act alike. Bronson, much like myself is overly friendly, easily excitable, unaware of his surroundings, ignores boundaries, needs his autonomy and just wants you to love him. all. the. time.
He eats my food when i'm not looking, sneaks on the furniture in the middle of the night and finds a new way out of the backyard daily. He has been brought home by animal control more times than i'd like to admit. And more times than I'd like to admit I've cried to john 'JUST TAKE HIM AWAY, HE CAN'T LIVE HERE ANY MORE'. But John, being the wise man he is, has never listened to me.
He's my dog and gosh-darnit, I love the hell out of him.
Tuesday, March 25, 2014
Trains. Our world around here revolves around trains (well that and The Fantastic mr. Fox soundtrack which redding begs to listen to no less than five times a day). Two year olds are something else man, how do you pack such big intense emotions into such a little body? He breaks my heart daily, he really does ... but I wouldn't have it any other way, i just absolutely adore him.